Guest blog by Dale Mackey
My husband Shawn and I are both lucky enough to be self-employed doing work that we're passionationatea about. He's a photographer who captures life in a way that makes the world look like an interesting and beautiful place. I am a baker and manager of our community event space, The Central Collective. Being able to do what I love and run a space for people to gather is the best job in the world... until there's a global pandemic.
We too are in quarantine. Our physical life pivots have included canceled appointments, postponed events and slowing things down according to the needs of our community and clients. In a hurry, we created the Good Sport Box (and sold out twice), we moved our First Friday celebration to Instagram and created a basket of ping pong balls to give us fun ideas for ways to pass the time when we get antsy. What! We're muddling along like everyone else, alternately feeling sorry for ourselves and working to find the silver lining. As we've accepted the reality that we're going to be stuck in limbo for a while, it’s time for a conversation. How are we - all of us? What have we learned? What can we do better together?
It’s a tough one. I feel like we are coming up for air after a few weeks of uncertainty. That’s not to say the uncertainty is gone, rather we’ve grown a bit used to its companionship. Our Maker Meet-in allowed several of you to talk about your own challenges.
Along with the physical changes, we’ve also had to make some “mental pivots.” Finances, opportunity uncertainty and the inability to properly plan has taken its toll on brain space. We all deal with these adjustments in our own ways, each of us putting our own unique pressures on ourselves. I've been working to readjust my expectations of myself. I'm trying to give myself permission to stop making progress, to stop worrying about "success" (whatever "success" means in a pandemic), and to focus instead of sustainability. What do I need to sustain myself and my work through this chaos. What does a "good" day look like now? Is it crossing off something on a to-do list? – maybe. Is it sparing some time to read a few chapters? – maybe. Is it making a phone call to your oldest friend and refusing to do anything else but listen to her voice? – maybe.
Society values certain ways of coping with a crisis. I process anxiety with action. Making plans and quickly acting upon them gives me a focus and a sense of control. It also maybe makes it seem like I have my sh*t together when in fact I'm as lost as anyone. There's is no “correct” way to handle a pandemic (other than staying home, washing your hands, and not touching your face – this last one is SO hard for me!). Maybe you've spent the past few weeks non-stop hustling while learning a new hobby and Marie Kondo-ing your entire house while somehow also working from home and keeping your children entertained and educating them. Maybe you've spent the last few weeks paralyzed with fear and sadness on your couch. Maybe you're somewhere in between. Wherever you are, please be gentle and generous with yourself. Cut yourself some slack. When we make space for ourselves, we make space for others.
Moving forward, I don't have any answers. But I want to continue the questions and conversation. The internet may drive us all insane at times, but I'm so grateful for it now that we can't have these conversations in person. It's an important tool to remind us that we really are all in this together.
How can we help lift each other up as we move into the uncertain future?